For Parents: Stay Strong!

The Benefits of Schedules

Consistent routines around school, exercise, play, and sleep really help create structure during the day. Plan a schedule around the times your child is in online learning, and also include the times you need to work, prepare meals, or recharge for yourself. Once you have your basic daily timeline mapped out, plug in the activities you know your child can participate in independently during the times you will need a break. I have found that my stepson can sit happily for 20 minutes working on a puzzle, so I save that for when we really need it.

Continue Services

As best as possible, try to keep up with the services that are available to you. Special education law has not been suspended. Interventions such as reading instruction or speech language therapy may continue. It has not been easy to juggle work with my stepson’s online school schedule. He has missed a few of his classes and therapies because of that. And honestly, sometimes the struggle of getting him to sit still for a video conference with the therapist requires energy I just don’t have. But I know his long-term growth requires that we stay on track, trying to build consistently on the skills he has. We don’t want his progress to stall.

Build Skills at Home

I can always rely on Nick Junior to keep my stepson quiet and occupied. And often that is the best I can do. But I am finding that our home is full of opportunities to teach essential life skills that will help him become more independent. He now makes his bed every morning, something we didn’t always do when rushing to catch the school bus on time. While cooking, I challenge him to get me the right amounts of ingredients I need. Observing his virtual lessons has shown me ways I can reinforce communication skills in all kinds of ways at home.

Communicate with the School

The experts at school have been so helpful with tips, motivation, and advice from everything from how to manage challenging behaviors during virtual lessons to how to talk about a death in the family. We feel very lucky that we have been able to communicate concerns and questions to the staff at school. Their expertise helps us coordinate an at-home plan for progress while in-person therapies are suspended.

Gratitude

It sounds crazy and a little cliché, but gratitude helps. In my worst moments, I try to remember all the things we have to be grateful for. We are healthy and safe for now. We can sleep at night. There is love and happiness amidst the chaos and noise and constant demands for attention.

I try to relish small victories, like the little ways my stepson is becoming more independent at home, or the joy he gets from being here with us all day.

Be Gentle

Most of us are not at our best right now, so be gentle with yourself if you don't always handle challenging behaviors with patience and grace. Forgive your spouse, and family, and teachers who are all doing their best in a difficult situation. I try to find moments throughout the day to release some of the tension, whether that means taking a deep breath, watching a funny cat video, playing upbeat music and dancing it out, or just staring mindlessly at a plant. I have also discovered the value of what I call the Quarantine Scream. It doesn’t solve anything, but it lets off some steam without hurting anyone.

Stay strong! You’re doing a wonderful job!